Cruising and Customs Since 9/11 – Honesty Is Still the Best Policy
by John Davies
I was fortunate in making two ocean cruises this year. After a couple of years of being retired retired, I decided it was time to go back to one of my favorite hobbies: travel. Here is what I found.
Returning to the United States on my very first transatlantic crossing by ship, we docked in Manhattan.
There were about two thousand passengers aboard. After three weeks on a ship, I was ready to hit land again. No problem. We cruised through customs like champs. No delays, no inspections. Hmm, I thought. I really should have brought my friend that baggie of soil from Scotland. No matter that the form said you couldn’t bring soil. They would never had caught it! What a fool I was. From my years around the Government, I really did still shy away from making false official statements. Oh well, the soil was tossed away and that was history. I had just guessed wrong.
...Or had I?
Right after Thanksgiving I made my second disembarkation for the year. This time it was in Fort Lauderdale. I’d ordered breakfast from room service that morning like I had done on most mornings. After all, I didn’t pay good money to stand in line before a couple of cups of coffee. I was munching on my second sweet roll when the phone rang. It was “guest services.” They were telling me that I had been randomly selected to be one of the hand inspected passengers by customs. Could I come right down, please? After negotiating time to shave and finish breakfast, I left the room, passport and customs declaration form in hand. The luggage containing two bottle of rum had been picked up the night before.
The night before as I was finishing up the details of leaving my stateroom, I read the customs declaration
Form I had already completed and signed. What is this about being allowed only one liter of liquor? Everyone knows it’s one gallon, or five fifths. Good thing I didn’t get the 3 liter bottle of Grand Marnier I was thinking about. That would have been a little over the gallon limit but I could have always said I didn’t understand the metric system very well.
As I had already itemized and signed my declaration. It would look a little hookey to write over the “2” and try to make it a “1.” Oh the devil be damned. If they want a few bucks for one extra bottle of rum, I’ll pay them. It’s too far to walk down to get a new customs declaration form anyway. I did hate the idea of standing in still another line to pay a couple of bucks to the customs people. Let ‘er rip, I thought.
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On next morning here I was standing in a “special” line of four people. That is out of 2,500 passengers. That was a 1 in ten thousand chance to be picked. People over the years had told me I was “special;” not always as a compliment, I recalled. The first person in line was a retired school teacher. She said, “Now I know what it feels like to be sent to the Principal’s office.” She and her husband were going back on another cruise in February. I told her I had one set up for the Spring.
The young customs officer did his best to stick to business. As he passed on her luggage, I yelled, wait, he’s got to give you a hall pass first! She turned and said “Put a little extra time on it, will you?” Finally it was my turn. How many bottles in here? “Two,” I said, already knowing my fate. “Any tobacco in here?” he asked. Oh no, just the rum (smile). OK, go ahead. And that was that.
I was free to leave without paying duty. The officer probably knew as well as I did that it would cost the Government more to collect the duty on one bottle of rum than it would to process the collection.
Is there a morale to this story, a lesson to be learned? I really don’t know. I do know that sometimes the odds go against you, and I still don’t make false official statements. Happy New Year and Happy Cruising.
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John has had many lives: Former President, San Diego Writers and Editors Guild; Adjunct Professor, San Diego State University; published book "Paperless Contracting: The EDI Revolution", 1994 Holbrook & Kellogg, Vienna, VA; published essays and articles over a 26 year period. Currently lives in San Diego, but is on the road mostly. |
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John Davis |
Thanks for sharing, John... J. Wolf
