Page Eight - Fox and Quill, vol 5, issue 5, May 2010


 

Friendship–A Mighty Concept and Cherished Asset
by Irv Newman

In the pantheon of the necessities in life, friendship is a critical and select imperative. With eighty-six years of investment in the friendship business, I can make this elusive concept a thing of beauty. Friendship is both perception and fact. It is nuance and declaration. A wrong in the name of friendship may not be a wrong! Similarly, a right may not be truly a right.

Wisdom and durability are critical ingredients of any friendship. At a minimum, friendship can be complex or straightforward, but in total, its essence and substance are vital for solidity and meaning. Absolutes seldom figure in a genuine friendship. The magic balance of contribution and acceptance are some of the defining moments. Loyalties can be misguided, inappropriate or poorly chosen, but there is a deliciousness and pride when you can proclaim an individual as one of your proven friends.

A true friendship is a commitment almost as sacred as a marriage. Such a friendship offers a relationship that can last a lifetime. It embraces all that is good and bad, happy or troubled, but worth the effort to make it prosper. Friendship can be a love fest (ups downs included) possessing the sensitivity and sustenance of completeness.

Taken to its extreme, friendship can literally save a life ─ a kidney, bone marrow, blood transfusions or other transferable body parts. Or, you may be mired deep in a funk helpless to take affirmative action, but with the loyalty and solidity of a friendship, your soul may be galvanized into action. Amazingly, you can discover what a smile, pat on the back or words of encouragement will achieve. With further hyperbole, friendship is that ephemeral state that offers contentment, power and strength to help you do wonderful things you never thought possible.
There is not complete balance in the friend relationship. Sensitivity, compassion and other complexities are not prevalent in equal measure. If I’m looking for complete equity in a friendship, I (and my friend) know this will not always occur. One of us is doing, adding or suggesting more than the other, but the magic of compatibility makes things right.

Friendship can be viewed as a bank account of “deposits and withdrawals” but somehow they balance out perfectly whatever the circumstances.

Click on this: next column


Thanks for saga advice, Irv... J. Wolf


Write a review...

Read Responses Sent In

 



Other Credentials of a Mutual Friendship


  • A full awareness of what it means to be connected.
  • Bonds of companionship are loose and tight with mutual understanding prevailing.
  • The wisdom of knowing when to agree with me and when to present a new set of circumstances.
  • Increase our mutual knowledge through experiences and successes.
  • Enrich our lives by sharing adventures and challenges.
  • Make each other happy and smiley, but seldom sorrowful.
  • Be generous and be sporty.
  • Forgive each other’s foibles except when they become too outrageous.
  • Reinforce attitudes or skills with mutual encouragement.
  • Change a date or alter a plan without recriminations. (do sparingly)
  • Perception or silence can define the right thing to do at the right time.
  • Joy, humor and intelligence are wonderful attributes to offer the other.
  • Encourage each other to undertake goals and objectives.
  • The greatest credential ─ simply knowing that we’ll always be there for the other.

Irv Newmann
Biography

There is a bit of every man in the first-time author of "Living On House Money." This 87 year old octogenarian is a self-confessed do gooder who claims to the answers to many of life's dilemmas. He has experienced both rejections and successes in a full and eventful career. Decidedly, he endorses victory over defeat and provides methods to handle discouraging circumstances. "Whimsy" he claims, "is the first cousin to nuance and humor."

Mr. Newman is a WW2 vet, an op-ed writer, a cancer survivor and a devoted husband, father and grandfather. He and his wife Beatrice just celebrated their 67th Wedding Anniversary. With half a stomach he still manages to play tournament tennis in his effor to retain the Florida Senior Singles Championship in the 85-90 age group. The author concedes that getting through a long lifetime is not for the faint of heart. He is a member of Susan Haley's Sarasota Chapter of The Florida Writers Association and still eagerly contributes editorial articles to the local papers. Mr. Newman consistently brings his humor and practical philosophy to the Writers Group much to the delight of the participants."


 


"Genuine poetry can communicate before it is understood." - T. S. Eliot
Return to Fox & Quill front page.

RtArrow